I tried to send this to the Washington Post but I was probably too late in the week when I sent it off. Since I haven't heard from them, I'm feeling free to post:
By congressional joint resolution, “the last Sunday in September is Gold Star Mother’s Day.” The law, first enacted in 1936, states: “The President is requested to issue a proclamation calling on
United States Government officials to display the flag of the United States on
all Government buildings, and the people of the United States to display the
flag and hold appropriate meetings at homes, churches, or other suitable
places, on Gold Star Mother’s Day as a public expression of the love, sorrow,
and reverence of the people for Gold Star Mothers” (36 US Code 111). From that
year to this, Presidents of all parties and affiliations have issued these
proclamations.
Yet so few people know
about Gold Star Mothers that I was startled and touched recently when a regular
customer at the store where I work approached me to say, “I did not know you
are a Gold Star Mother.” Purely by
accident she had seen an old interview on our local cable channel, and heard me
talking about my son, Army SPC Thomas Doerflinger, who was killed in Iraq in
2004. My customer knew about Gold Star
mothers, and she knew that the fact that Thomas had died in military service
made me one.
Military survivors are
Gold Star family members -- named for the service flag star which is blue when
a family member is deployed abroad, and is changed to gold if that member
dies. The mothers have had a leading
role since the end of World War I, when the American Gold Star Mothers
organization was created and incorporated.
Grace Darling Seibold’s son was lost in Europe during that war. She visited military hospitals hoping to find
her son among the wounded, but instead found a calling to comfort the injured
and their families. Ultimately other
mothers who had lost their children joined her in this mission, which continues
today.
During these years there
have been times when there were many Gold Star Mothers—the very first one I met
was my uncle’s mother, who had lost a son in the Philippines early in World War
II—and times when they are few. The
Vietnam era mothers are very old now, and many are gone. People forgot what that Gold Star means
because they did not need to know, and for that we can be grateful. But now we have been at war since 2001. In that time, over six thousand men and women
have lost their lives while serving their country in the military. Those soldiers, marines, airmen and sailors
have left families behind: wives and children, mothers and fathers, brothers
and sisters. The mothers once again have seen a need and joined together to
help others.
Not all Gold Star
mothers join the formal organization, but all feel a kinship in our grief and
sorrow. We are proud of our children and
their decision to serve their country.
And we are determined that our fallen will not be forgotten. For that reason, you will find us this
weekend at Arlington National Cemetery laying a wreath at the Tomb of the
Unknown, at the Vietnam Memorial, and at the National Cathedral,
remembering. Members of the American
Gold Star Mothers wear white at official events so we are easily found in
crowds. This weekend, if you see one of
the “ladies in white,” I hope you will greet her, offer your condolences, ask
about her child. And if you can’t visit
a memorial, I hope you will read this year’s Presidential Proclamation and fly
your American flag, while reflecting on the sacrifice that so many families
have made and will make in the future.
Labels: Gold Star Mother's Day 2014